5 Ways to Trick the Spooky Feelings & Treat Your Spirit!
That time of year is upon us again. The days grow shorter, the leaves transform, and the next three months are filled with decorations and family gatherings.
While some eagerly anticipate these seasonal changes, others might echo Winifred Sanderson’s famous line, "Oh, look. Another glorious morning. Makes me sick!"
What are ‘Spooky Feelings?’
We know that I don't believe in "good" or "bad" emotions; rather, I see them as messengers. However, in sticking with the theme, let’s discuss some emotions that are a bit more ‘spookier’ to navigate than those like joy and giddiness.
As I pull out my handy dandy feelings wheel some emotions that immediately draw my attention include: Fearful, Numb, Overwhelmed, Helpless, and Worthless. Whew! When heavy emotions such as these surface we may try to protect ourselves from the discomfort aka the spookiness by withdrawing, avoiding, or engaging in behaviors that neglect our needs. We don’t want to feel the distress of these emotions, instead we want to run as if Michael Myers is behind us.
The unfortunate reality is that we cannot outrun the emotion. What we can do is take care of ourselves as we navigate them.
Ways to Treat Your Spirit
Take yourself on a ‘Color Walk.’
The concept of a Color Walk blew up on social media and for great reasons! A Color Walk is when you choose a color before you head out the door and then focus on that one color throughout the duration of your walk.
In the spirit of Halloween let’s say that you picked the color orange. During your walk you would be on the lookout for anything in shades of orange such as pumpkins, flowers, or decorations.
Engaging in movement and spending time outdoors are excellent methods for alleviating stress and fostering a sense of security within your nervous system. But, there are times when we take walks and our mind wanders to work stressors, or reruns challenging interactions, which makes the activity just as stressful.
A Color Walk combines the benefits of movement and being outdoors while incorporating intentionality and mindfulness. During a Color Walk you are purposefully being present and forcing your brain to focus on the external surroundings.
If Color Walks don’t feel feasible for your area there are different ways to incorporate mindfulness throughout your walk. Try an Alphabet Walk where instead of focusing on a color the focus is on finding things that start with each letter of the alphabet.
Connect with your tribe.
Humans are naturally wired for connection, even those who are more introverted. As social beings, we inherently seek out social interactions and connections, a desire that can be traced back to infancy and our relationships with primary caregivers (hello, attachment theory!).
When life feels chaotic and emotions are heavy, it's time to lean on your support system, or what I call my 'tribe.' These relationships and connections create a warm and validating environment that serves as a reminder that we are not alone in our challenges. This reassurance can help reduce rates of depression, anxiety, and psychological distress.
There are many ways to connect with your support system whether it's through shared meals, scheduled video calls, or coffee walks. Enjoy the fall season by watching Halloween movies, doing crafts like carving pumpkins and creating candy corn centerpieces, or gathering around a campfire to roast marshmallows with loved ones.
Journal.
Journaling is a wonderful outlet. The spooky feelings can often be demanding and at times, confusing. Research has illustrated that journaling assists in lessening that emotional load by helping us to identify thought cycles, improve awareness, create insights and regulate emotions.
When we journal we create space and permission to befriend our inner world. This is an opportunity to process our deepest thoughts and feelings in a manner that can be messy, raw, and imperfect. When suggesting journaling to a client I frequently remind them to journal in a way that is comfortable for them. Sometimes journaling is structured with guided prompts and other times it is a free flow stream of our narrative. Let journaling be whatever it needs and welcome the scribbles, misspelt words, pictures, highlights, and scratch outs.
In case you need help getting started here are two journaling prompts for the spooky feelings:
🎃 We all possess a "shadow self"—the hidden aspect of our being that houses the truths we'd rather not acknowledge, even to ourselves. This exercise invites you to compose a letter to this shadow self, recognizing its existence and the influence it wields in your life, and the needs it has.
🎃 Imagine your anxiety as a haunted house with each room representing various aspects of your worries. What does each room look like? Are there any rooms that you are scared to enter?
Ground yourself in the season.
Sometimes life hits hard and you feel flooded with stress, worry, and doubt. Maybe you are questioning your purpose. Or maybe you are feeling grief at the current state of the world. At times it can feel easy to just detach and check out as a way of protecting us from the discomfort.
However, I want you to entertain the idea of incorporating grounding techniques as a way of disrupting the stress cycle and creating safety as well as calm within. Grounding helps us shift our focus back into the present moment through the engagement of our senses, which assists in pulling us away from intense and intrusive emotions, dissociative states, or thoughts triggered by trauma.
Some common grounding techniques include the 5-4-3-2-1 technique, deep breathing, and meditation exercises. Implementing grounding techniques in the fall season can look like:
👻 Grabbing your favorite festive warm drink like a pumpkin spice latte or a chai spiced apple cider and noticing the sensation on your hands, the way it travels through your body, and the taste of spices, heat, and sweetness.
👻Being outside in nature by exploring some trails and noticing the crunch of leaves, feeling the breeze and sun on your skin while looking out for wildlife and collecting fun leaves. Currently, the weather in Texas is gorgeous, which makes grounding outside enjoyable, especially picking up pecans barefoot in the backyard!
👻 Breathing exercises that follow fun Halloween themed shapes and visually guide us through inhales, exhales and holds. These patterns are especially fun and helpful when practicing with children. When engaging in this technique the focus is on the way your belly fills and releases while paying attention to the way your heart rate responds.
Create your own ‘boo’ basket.
I’m a huge ‘treat yo’self’ girly, which makes this my favorite way to treat the spirit!
Being on social media I have seen ‘boo’ baskets everywhere! It’s a sweet gesture usually occurring between romantic partners where a basket of festive goodies is assembled and delivered. I’ve never received a ‘boo’ basket but I imagine that one would feel loved, appreciated, and considered.
Now, imagine creating that feeling for yourself especially during a time where you might be feeling anything but loved, appreciated and considered. Give yourself permission to curate an amazing, fall inspired care package of all your favorite things. Include things that make you feel comforted and safe. Include things that spark your curiosity or lean into your ‘bed rot’ inspo for the evening. When in the midst of a dark time we usually neglect ourselves but by creating a ‘boo’ basket we take a step towards showing up for ourselves.
My ‘boo’ basket would include a cute fall mug, a Diet Coke (always festive!), candy corn and roasted cashews (trust me this combination is everything), a psychological thriller book, and a Halloween pajama set. I’d love to know what you create in yours!
It’s okay if this season is full of spooky feelings. Even in this season I will remind you that your spirit is worthy of feeling lifted and that you don’t have to navigate this alone. At Be Counseling, located in Magnolia, TX, support is always available.
If you’re ready to reflect and heal, reach out – I’d love to walk this path with you.
